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      ?今日:2019年 10月 08日 星期二 农历: 己亥年九月初十
      培养让孩子受益一生的品质
      发布日期:2017-06-05  点击数:946

      清晨,海边的沙滩上走着一个孩子,他走得很慢,并且时不时把什么东西扔进海里。原来,沙滩的浅水洼里常常有被海浪卷上来的小鱼。

      这些小鱼被困在浅水洼里,虽然离大海很近,可它们就是无法回去。孩子想救这些小鱼,他就不停地弯腰捡起小鱼然后拼命把它们扔回海里。

      一天,一个人散步经过,对孩子说:“沙滩上这样的小鱼很多,你救不过来的。”孩子头也不抬地说:“我知道。”

      这个人很奇怪地问:“那你为什么还要不停地扔?谁在乎呢?”孩子捡起一条小鱼说,“这条在乎,那条也在乎,还有这一条……”

      相信很多人都读过这个故事,而且都被故事中的孩子感动着,这个孩子有一颗金子般的仁爱之心。

      从汉字本身来看,“仁”是“二人”,是人与人之间的相处之道。孔子说:“仁者爱人。”人与人之间的相处之道是“爱”,人不仅要爱自己还要爱别人。

      但在现实生活中又有多少孩子能做到爱别人呢?一位儿童教育家说:“只知索取,不知付出;只知爱己,不知爱人,是当前独生子的通病。”孩子为什么会如此?是他们天生都如此吗?

      儿童心理学家的研究表明,孩子天性中就有善良和同情等品质。婴儿一岁前,会在别的孩子哭时一起哭,这是他对别人情绪的感应。

      幼儿一两岁的时候会用自己的玩具或食品去安慰哭泣的孩子,他在试图帮别的孩子减轻痛苦。到了五六岁,孩子就会主动安慰伤心难过的孩子。

      既然“人之初,性本善”,为什么越来越多的孩子却对同伴表现出自私、冷漠、幸灾乐祸的一面呢?

      这与我们的后天教育、社会环境等因素有关。也许我们本身就是一个只爱自己不爱别人的人,孩子受影响自然也只爱自己不爱别人;

      也许我们溺爱孩子,让他成为家庭的中心,作为中心的他习惯了聚集所有人的爱于一身,而没有学会将爱传播出去;也许我们在孩子表现出爱心的时候,告诉他“不要多管闲事”……

      从现在开始,学国学,读经典,让孩子拥有一颗仁爱之心,因为仁爱是人类光辉灿烂的人性,是崇高且伟大的品德,拥有仁爱之心,能让孩子受益一生。

      那么,怎样培养孩子的仁爱之心呢?

      第一,引导孩子关爱身边的人。

      亲人、邻居、老师、同学都是孩子身边的人,我们要引导他去关爱这些人。如亲人生病了,让他去看望一下,或者打电话问候一声;

      老师嗓子沙哑了,给老师端杯水润润喉;同学摔倒了,让他去拉一把并安慰安慰;家里有好吃的,让他送点给邻居等。这些细节行为能让孩子的内心生出仁爱。

      第二,适当让孩子养一些小动物。

      可以试着让孩子养一些小动物,如小鱼、乌龟、小鸡、小鸭等,孩子会在付出中,也能收获爱心、善良以及责任感等,也能让孩子对生命有所感悟,从而珍惜生命、热爱生命。

      第三,让孩子学会同心共情。

      有一个成语叫感同身受,在别人悲伤、痛苦时,我们能理解能体会,如同自己感受到一般,对孩子爱心的培养,我们也可以运用同心共情让他感同身受。

      当孩子看到另一个孩子因丢失物品而难过时,我们可以让孩子想想他自己的经历,他可能就很容易理解这个孩子的感受,并因共同经历而同情甚至安慰对方。

      除了培养孩子的仁爱之心,还应当培养孩子诚实守信的优良品质。

      诚实守信,是做人的一种优良品德。诚实守信的人,会对自己、对他人真诚忠实,严守承诺,说到做到。

      孩子来到这个世界,纯洁无瑕,但却有很多父母发现自己的孩子有撤谎、违约和食言的行为,为什么会这样呢?

      第一,有些妈妈在孩子面前善意地撒谎。

      浩然和奶奶说好晩上回奶奶家,可是,妈妈想到挤车太累、太辛苦,就临时打了退堂鼓。她看到浩然在投入地搭积木,就拿起电话跟婆婆说:“妈,浩然的英语班临时加了一节课,今天回不去了。”

      浩然听到的只是妈妈在撒谎,次数多了,孩子就会觉得撒谎这种行为很正常,他也渐渐学会撒谎,从小谎言到大谎言。

      第二,孩子为了满足自己的某种要求、愿望而撒谎。

      孩子慢慢长大,面对丰富多彩的世界,会有各种各样的要求和愿望,我们当然不会完全满足,但孩子为了使自己的要求、愿望得到满足,他就会想办法,办法之一就是撒谎。

      如想买一把枪,就说其他小朋友都有了,只有他没有;如不想刷牙,就在盥洗间待一会儿,然后出来说刷完牙了。

      第三,孩子为了逃避责骂而不诚实。

      孩子通常都比较喜欢冒险,也比较顽皮,所以经常会闯祸。如果妈妈对孩子要求严格,孩子闯祸后,就会为了逃避打骂而撒谎。

      第四,孩子因为考虑问题不全面而违约。

      因为孩子年龄小,考虑问题不全面,很可能轻易地答应了别人要做什么事,到后来却发现这件事自己根本就做不了,结果导致孩子不能遵守承诺。

      我们无法接受孩子撒谎、违约和食言的行为,“言必信,行必果”、“君子一言,驷马难追”,是我们从古人那里传承到的做人的基本准则,孩子未来要想事业有成,就必须具备诚实守信的品德。那么如何才能让孩子不撒谎呢?

      首先,我们要做诚实守信的父母。

      父母的言谈举止是孩子模仿的对象,如果妈妈不想让孩子撒谎,自己首先要做到不撒谎,否则,不仅会将妈妈在孩子面前的威信毁掉,孩子自己也会养成撒谎的习惯。

      满足孩子的合理要求,或说出不满足的理由。妈妈可以说:“你有了同样的枪,它们虽然外形不同,但功能是一样的,所以我们不买哈。”有理由的拒绝,孩子比较容易接受。

      当孩子不得不食言而失信于人时,妈妈一定要让孩子向对方道款,并说明缘由,这不仅能获得对方的谅解,也能让孩子体会到许诺是一件很重要的事,他下次许诺前就会慎重考虑了。

      孩子天性善良的,他也不愿意为自己闯祸而撒谎,然后承受撒谎后的内心折磨。所以妈妈要在家中营造一个温馨的环境,当孩子闯祸后,他可以告诉妈妈,妈妈和他一起想办法来补救。如果能这样做,又有哪个孩子乐意去撒谎呢?

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